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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25794751">Coming home [but where is home?]</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Onnoff/pseuds/Onnoff'>Onnoff</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>AU-gust 2020 [9]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Magic Kaito</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Royalty, F/F, Gen, I think?, Introspection, M/M, POV Hakuba Saguru, Reminiscing, do i tag for break up?, im not sure..., is it a break up when there was nothing to break?, mentioned aoko/akako, mild body dysmorphia, narnia - freeform</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 09:34:30</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,173</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25794751</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Onnoff/pseuds/Onnoff</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Day 9: Royalty</p><p>For the first time, Saguru was struggling to adjust after traveling and returning home.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Hakuba Saguru &amp; Koizumi Akako &amp; Kuroba Kaito | Kaitou Kid &amp; Nakamori Aoko</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>AU-gust 2020 [9]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1860001</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>AUgust 2020</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Coming home [but where is home?]</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This fic is unbeta'd.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>    It was a strange experience for him. To go from being a king for over 20 years, only to return to being a teenager on the verge of turning 18. But that was what happened when they finally, accidentally, and probably due to the help of Lucifer found the exit from Malecia that led them back to their own world.</p><p>    He had been a king for longer than he had lived as Hakuba Saguru, teenage detective.</p><p>    After they’ve returned to the real world.</p><p>    The real world.</p><p>    What really decides which world was real?</p><p>    What made Malecia, the world he spent over 20 years of his life living in, any less real than the world he was born in?</p><p>    Who was he to decide that?</p><p>    He ruled there.</p><p>    Ruled his subjects, defended his people, led knights in wars and won many.</p><p>    Who was he to say that those people, the people he ruled, led and fought side by side with, were any less real?</p><p>    He’s only been alive in this world for 17 years.</p><p>    Saguru found himself in a feedback loop of thoughts whenever anything happened to remind him that he no longer knew his body.</p><p>    Saguru was almost 40.</p><p>    Saguru was almost 18.</p><p>    Everyday he was reminded of how different he was. His body, from adult to the transitional in between once more. Muscles that he had developed through rigorous training and fighting to defend his kingdom, all went back to what he had from his semi regular exercise routine and occasional visit to the MMA dojo. Scars he had gained from these battles had vanished, as if he never had them, as if he had never fought with his life on the line to defend the very people he ruled.</p><p>    Sometimes he’d run his hand over the areas of his body he <em>knew</em> a scar had formed, feeling unnerved at the smoothness of his own skin.</p><p>    He felt weaker than he had ever been, even if he was the strongest that he had ever been in this body.</p><p>    What did that strength matter when he’d live 20 years as a stronger man, both in body and mind?</p><p>    His mind.</p><p>    That might have been the most frustrating part of all.</p><p>    While it felt like he’d managed to retain all the knowledge he’d gain from his time in Malecia, it felt as if he’d lost half of the wisdom he’d gain during his time there.</p><p>    He knew he hadn’t truly lost any of the wisdom he’d gain. His emotions were simply too temperamental for him to utilize that wisdom properly. Suddenly he was making stupid mistakes that he’d known was a mistake from a mile away, all over again. Too temperamental because he was a growing teen, a mess of hormones. Once again, his body reminded him of Malecia with its failures.</p><p>    So really, was any of the things that he experienced real? Was it real when he couldn’t return to his kingdom? Was it real when he had nothing from Malecia to prove it exists? Was it real when even his own body couldn’t be the proof of the time he spent there?</p><p>    But.</p><p>    Then.</p><p>    How does that mindset affect Akako’s existence?</p><p>    HIs classmate, his friend, his family.</p><p>    The High Queen herself.</p><p>    Akako, who came from Malecia.</p><p>    The true heir to the throne.</p><p>    A threat to the false queen that they overthrew.</p><p>    Akako, whose family was forced to give her up. Shoved her through a portal with some of their servants, in hopes that their only daughter would live, <em>just</em> live, another day.</p><p>    If he deemed that Malecia was merely a figment of his imagination, what does that make Akako?</p><p>    Of course, the only conclusion he could come to, the only logical conclusion, was that both worlds were just as real as the other.</p><p>    Just because he could no longer return to Malecia didn’t mean that it was never there.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>    Things went back to the way they were before they went into Akako’s closet.</p><p>    Well, not exactly.</p><p>    Both Akako and Aoko pointed out to him that it felt strange to have him go back to using honorifics with them, when he hasn’t been for at least over 10 years now. So he dropped the honorifics.</p><p>    Akako and Aoko have also begun dating. Or, continued to date, he should say. As they were simply continuing where they left off in Malecia. The queens, Magnificent and Valiant, who once stood proudly, together turned to awkward teens stumbling through the first steps of romance for the second time. Their love for each other never waxed or waned.</p><p>    It was beautiful to watch and a blessing to get to witness it again.</p><p>    There were differences from the first time, of course. This time they had already known that they love each other, with heart, mind, and soul. They’ve loved each other for over 20 years, a few awkward dates and stumbles of teenage hastiness wouldn’t change that.</p><p> </p><p>    He wondered why things were different for him and Kuroba-kun.</p><p>    While Akako and Aoko insisted that he called them by their first name just as he did back in Malecia, Kuroba-kun did no such thing. Instead, Kuroba-kun called him Hakuba.</p><p>    Things went back to how it was with him and Kuroba-kun.</p><p>    They were barely friends and more than classmates.</p><p>    He went back to attending KID heists and Kuroba-kun went back to insulting his skills, along with Nakamori-keibu’s as well (which Aoko punished him for).</p><p>    He wondered if it had to do with KID.</p><p>    KID, who didn’t exist in Malecia.</p><p>    (on some days, Saguru would think back to the time he had spent with his husband. Before he quickly reminded himself that things were no longer the way they were, and there was no point for him to wistfully long for days that had passed.)</p><p>    He wondered if it was only possible to love him after he has aged and changed. Did the passage of time shape him into someone that Kuroba-kun finally deemed worthy?</p><p>    Saguru didn’t mind being unlovable, as long as he was himself, he was okay with it. He didn't think he was someone that was desperate to be loved, not in the romantic sense, that is.</p><p>    (but sometimes he couldn’t help but miss his husband either.)</p><p>    No matter how much he cared for Kuroba-kun, Saguru refused to change himself for someone else.</p><p>    He didn’t need Kuroba-kun to change himself for him either.</p><p>    Kuroba-kun wouldn’t be who he is without his autonomy over himself. His sense of self, his opinion and thoughts, everything that made Kuroba-kun who he is... it was everything that drew Saguru’s attention to him in the first place.</p><p>    They would not be who they are without their autonomy.</p><p>    So Saguru wouldn’t trade that for anything in the world.</p><p>    (no matter how much he missed him.)</p><p>    So he settled for being Kuroba-kun’s classmate, his barely friend. It’s fine, they still had at least 20 years to get back to where they were in Malecia.</p><p>    <strike>But let’s be real, it probably had to do with KID.</strike></p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>If you'd like me to expand on this fic, please leave a comment below.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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